Best smile awards

0 comments

Best smile awards announced for the past year of 2007. Here are the winners accross the world...
8th place goes to ...



7th place goes to ...


6th place goes to ...

5th place goes to ...

4th place goes to ...

3rd place goes to ...


2nd place winner ...


And the winner is ...

Amazing Sculptures

0 comments

Ron Mueck is a London-based photo-realist artist. Born in Melbourne,Australia, to parents who were toy makers, he labored on children's television shows for 15 years before working in special effects for such films as Labyrinth, a 1986 fantasy epic starring David Bowie. Eventually Mueck concluded that photography pretty much destroys the physical presence of the original object, and so he turned to fine art and sculpture. In the early 1990's, still in his advertising days, Mueck was commissioned to make something highly realistic, and was wondering what material would do the trick. Latex was the usual, but he wanted something harder, more precise. Luckily, he saw a little architectural decor on the wall of a boutique and inquired as to the nice, pink stuff's nature. Fiberglass resin was the answer, and Mueck has made it his bronze and marble ever since














His work is lifelike but not life size, and being face to face with the tiny, gossiping Two Women (2005) or the monumental woman In Bed (2005) is an unforgettable experience.

Learn important lessons within 10 Minutes ( Part 2 )

0 comments

Lesson 4

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?'The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.Moral of the storyTo be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.


Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull. 'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.''Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients.'The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch..Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.Moral of the storyBull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.


Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.The dung was actually thawing him out!He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Morals of the story(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut! THUS

ENDS THE TEN MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE

Learn important lessons within 10 Minutes ( Part 1 )

0 comments




Lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour.Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?''It was Bob the next door neighbour,' she replies.'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'Moral of the storyIf you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.


Lesson 2

A priest offered a Nun a lift.
She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.The priest nearly had an accident.After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.'Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.'Moral of the storyIf you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.


Lesson 3

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.''Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas , driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'Puff! She's gone.'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.'Puff! He's gone.'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'Moral of the storyAlways let your boss have the first say.

Abhinav Bindra - First ever Indian to get an Olympic gold medal in singles

0 comments




Abhinav Bindra clinched the World Champioship gold, the first ever for India in shooting, with a spectacular performance in the air rifle final on Monday.

The 23-year-old Delhi lad, a two-time Olympian, went into the final a joint leader with two others at 597, and shot a 102.1 in a nerve-wracking climax to emerge top from a strong field of 122 shooters from nearly 100 countries.


Wishes to him for this achievement...

Assassination

0 comments

The KGB had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists — two men and one woman. For the final test, the KGB agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."

The first man said."You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife,"

The agent replies, "Then you're not the right man for this job."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes.

Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent replies, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

Finally, it was the woman's turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.

She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. So I had to beat him to death with the chair."

Give me a break

0 comments


Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man said to the American,

"You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven't even met once. We call this arranged marriage. I don't want to marry a woman whom I don't love...I told them that openly and now I have a hell lot of family problems."

The American said, "Talking about love marriages... I'll tell you my story.

I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years."After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father's father-in-law.

The American continued,

My daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother. More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father's brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father's son I.e. My brother is my grandson. Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson.

And you say you have family problems.... Give me a break!!"

Me and My Boss

0 comments




When I Take a long time to finish, I am slow,

When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough


When I don't do it, I am lazy,

When my boss does not do it, he is busy,


When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart,

When my boss does the same, he takes the initiative,


When I please my boss, I am apple polishing,

When my boss pleases his boss, he is cooperating,


When I make a mistake, I' am an idiot.

When my boss makes a mistake, he's only human.


When I am out of the office, I am wondering around.

When my boss is out of the office, he's on business.

7 reasons not to mess up with a child

0 comments

**********
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

**********

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".

**********

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or loo king up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

**********

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead."

**********

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.. " "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

**********

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.

**********

Software engineer and his wife

0 comments

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife - would you like to have some snacks?
Husband - hard disk full.


Wife - have you brought the saree.
Husband - Bad command or file name.


Wife - but I told you about it in morning
Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.


Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary.
Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.


Wife - at least give me your credit card, I can do some shopping.
Husband - sharing violation, access denied.


Wife - I made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband - data type mismatch.


Wife - you are useless.
Husband - by default.


Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.


Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?
Husband - the only user with write permission.


Wife - what is my value in your life?
Husband - unknown virus detected.


Wife - do you love me or your computer?
Husband - Too many parameters.


Wife - I will go to my dad's house.
Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close.


Wife - I will leave you forever.
Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.


Wife - it is worthless talking to you.
Husband - shut down the computer.


Wife - I am going
Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer

Sweet Memories from School

0 comments

Let's start with some theoritical questions and answers
(Note:- If you are not able to read the content of the images, please click on them to get higher pixel rate)



Some mathametical unsolved problems





Everything has a gender

0 comments


You may not know this but many nonliving things have a gender.

A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.

A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again.

It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male ,didn't you?

But consider this - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!

World's best designed car keys

0 comments



















Excellence of Photography

0 comments